Only in America...
1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance.
2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of
a skating rink.
3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way
to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy
people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America......do people order double cheese burgers, large
fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain
the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in
the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls
and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we
didn't want to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns
in packages of eight.
9. Only in America.....do we use the word 'politics' to describe the
process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
'bloodsucking creatures'.
10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with
Braille lettering.
11. Only in America......can a homeless combat veteran live in a
cardboard box and a draft dodger live in the White House.
(I just thought of a #12: Only in America do more people vote for the
next American Idol than US President. I find this just disturbing, and
it's true: in 2006, 66 million+ voters voted for the next Idol, which
is more votes than any US President election in history. Shows where
our priorities are! And to think that Sanjaya might win this year.
Dammit.
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